Obsession and compulsion
2004-02-03

I'm really not sure what to write. I've been contemplating why I pushed things with "The Good Boy". We had already had the discussion that he wasn't looking for a relationship. We both just wanted to cuddle. I really was enjoying that, and he really was a nice boy. I actually enjoyed talking with him.

On a completely unrelated note, yesterday I contemplated throwing up my dinner. On purpose. I might be getting a little obsessive with this weight loss thing. I've already lost eight pounds. If I lose another eight pounds in the next month, I'll be impressed with myself.

My legs are a bit sore. I did a half an hour on the elliptical yesterday. It felt like nothing while I was doing it, even though I haven't been to the gym in a few months. I want to ramp up to like 2 hours a day of cardio, but that is probably insane. One hour in the morning, one hour in the evening. I also want to start hiking, but that won't happen until at least the spring. Its entirely too cold out. Maybe I could do an hour on the elliptical and an hour on the treadmill? Boredom is a serious problem. The fact that I want to sing along with my CD's is a problem too. I would love an mp3 player too.

I'm stressing about money. I have a birthday party in two weeks, and a bridal shower a week after that. I also have no money. No clue what to buy the birthday boy. And social anxiety about the bridal shower.

Could I have a handfull of Celexa please?

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